RT Articles

It's important to get rid of all your accumulated sociopathy before the new year so you don't pay taxes on it. That's the only way i can explain some of these stories, at least. Taking Christmas Eve/Christmas off, so hopefully there is at least a full-length article or five coming soon

December 17: What's the difference between Catholics & cannibals? One believes in population control; all work & no play drives Special Forces crazy

Catholic priest abuse investigations spread to 45 states: names named

A cannibal, his wife, and their mistress: modern love & ritual murder in Brazil

Murder, rape, pedophilia, assault, & sometimes they even go to war: US Special Forces under investigation

Nunchucks legal in New York after ban declared unconstitutional

December 18: Facebook screws users, again; Trump loses foundation, gains a worm; pot calls kettle black

Facebook sold access to users' private data without their knowledge, still thinks it did nothing wrong

Trump Foundation to be dissolved under governmental oversight

Blind wormlike amphibian to be named after Trump, because climate change 

Geopolitical thug Nikki Haley calls MBS 'thuggish,' because it takes one to know one

December 19: We have met the "Russian meddlers," & they are Democrats. If you read nothing else i wrote this week, please read this article, & share it with all your Russiagate-believing friends/relatives. Also: BuzzFeed beats Steele dossier defamation suit; Tesla spontaneously combusts; cultural otterpropriation

Democratic disinfo experts used "Russian" social media tricks to sway Alabama election

Judge dismisses Russian's defamation suit against BuzzFeed over Steele dossier libel

Tesla spontaneously combusts - twice in one day

CA aquarium's fat otter joke offends the perpetually-offended

December 20: When in doubt, blame Satan; legislative virtue-signaling; more reasons to avoid Alexa; Mad Dog put down; Senate finally criminalizes lynching

Alabama cops blame Satan (and Kids These Days) for homicide spike

Alexa, what's my neighbor doing? Amazon device sends recordings to stranger

'Mad Dog' Mattis to quit Trump administration because he can't have all the wars he wants

House approves border wall funding; government shutdown imminent as Schumer promises to block

Trump tweets surreal Green Acres clip to celebrate farm bill passage

Senate passes anti-lynching bill, 100 years too late

December 21: US to fund moar Ukrainian provocation; beefeaters join yellow vests; UK retakes migrant-hijacked ship; when is a wall not a wall?

US pledges $10mn more in military aid as Ukraine mulls second Kerch provocation

Beefeaters on strike at Tower of London for first time in 55 years, don yellow vests in solidarity

UK forces seize migrant-hijacked ship after 12hr standoff

Border bait-n-switch: the Wall has become a 'beautiful' fence

1929 will come again: stock market in toilet for Christmas


& missing from last week's collection - Mueller expands collusion hunt to...Israel?

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Last week, pigs flew. Now, we see the Clinton Foundation inching closer to actually being investigated for massive years-long tax evasion. Coincidence?


10 December: FBI-sponsored 'terror' in Toledo; screen-time melts kids' brains

Lacking terrorists to target, Toledo FBI creates & entraps their own

...twice. Two Toledo kids entrapped on the same weekend. USA! USA! 

New study finds 3+ hours daily screen time causes physical changes in kids' brains


11 December: Canada gets screwed for doing the US' dirty work; Trump holds Huawei CFO & US gov't hostage, issues demands; ex-Fed chief reminds us we're $crewed

China retaliates against Huawei CFO abduction, detaining Canadian ex-diplomat

Trump hints he'll ransom out-on-bail Meng in return for trade deal

Pelosi links Wall to Trump's 'manhood,' talks tinkling skunks in veiled alcoholism PSA

Why would anyone want to blow up Facebook?!?

Ex-Fed chief says history repeating itself (just replace 'mortgages' with 'corporate debt')


12 December: Migrants demand dollars for departure; scouts on brink of bankruptcy; a new national symbol

Migrants to Trump: let us in faster, or pay us $50k to go home

Unable to save itself with radical de-gendering, Boy Scouts weighing bankruptcy as sex abuse lawsuits pile up

Assange says he's being subtly Khashoggi'ed, spied on

Spite: ur doin' it rite (VT man flips off town board in a big way)


13 December: More probes for Trump; happiness is not in fact a warm gun; US to Saudis: pay up, pretty please

Just when Trump thought it was safe to come off the golf course...

A drone is not a toy - tell that to this plane

US gun deaths at record high thanks to rise in suicides

Pentagon meekly asks Saudi-led coalition to pay for all that free refueling


14 December: Clinton Foundation acted as foreign agent; Obamacare gets the ax; 3 genders no waiting; Objectivist nutjob replaces Kelly

Clinton Foundation gets Al Cap-OWNED, but are 6,000 pages of proof enough?

Obamacare declared unconstitutional (71st time's the charm?)

Germany to offer 3rd gender option on legal docs but LGBT groups cry foul at restrictions

Ayn Rand-loving "right-wing nutjob" who gutted CFPB named as Trump chief of staff

Egypt arrests locals who helped Danes stage nude Giza pyramid photo

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Hear no evil, see no evil, post no evil - but it has to come out sometime. You'd think we'd learn. Last week, without further ado...

Dec 3: Florida will be Florida; rats plan for post-sinking-ship life

Florida man posed as housewife to lure men for stealth gay porn 

FL elections chief Snipes un-resigns when Scott threatens her pension

CNN's Zucker threatens political run on Axelrod podcast

Trump lawyers seek double fees from Stormy & Avenatti


Dec 4: When pigs fly? Or does that oppress pigs? Flynn and an anonymous DoJ official get off, in different ways

NYPD takes to the skies with drone program

PETA expands PC protection to animals

Mueller recommends no jail for cooperating Flynn

Sex-abuser DoJ official escapes punishment, retires in anonymity

Ocasio-Cortez takes on Tesla: give back to the community


Dec 5: Vigilante justice and even the legal system works sometimes

Duterte sez: Catholic bishops are 'useless fools.' 'Kill them.'

USA Gymnastics declares bankruptcy in last-ditch ass-saving attempt

Brazilians cheer police shooting of jewel thief

Moonves investigation turns up more victims, blowjobs on call


Dec 6: Junior anti-sex league; robot uprising begins; academia bites back at CNN for Hill firing

Perennial porn crusade finds support on campus

Amazon robot puts human workers in hospital in bear mace "accident"

CNN called out for racist firing of Temple professor over pro-Palestine speech

Greece begs citizens for cash to expand navy


Dec 7: Facebook hates sex; WikiLeaks defends itself; rat tries to desert sinking ship, drowns anyway

Facebook quietly bans all discussion of consensual adult sex

WikiLeaks defends itself (and press freedom) against DNC crusade

Cooperatin' Cohen heading to prison anyway

Ocasio-Cortez threatens Trump Jr. with subpoena over mean tweet


(more "real" articles coming soon, as soon as I can find a few hours to rub together, at least. You can help make this happen by clicking the "donate" button on the right side of the page! Buy me a day off & who knows what will show up here)

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...in which George Orwell, Philip K. Dick, & Aldous Huxley all rise from the dead to shout - in unison, in protest - "It wasn't an instruction manual!" - as their books are moved to the nonfiction section.

Just kidding! there are no "bookstores" anymore, thanks to Wealthy Mr. Worm.

Without further ado, my coverage of last week... (The animation at right is produced by GE - to what purpose?) 


Nov 26: Prosecutorial (& porcine) incompetence - and we want to let these guys 'predictively police'?

Alabama cops blame innocent man they killed on Thanksgiving for his murder

Prosecutors want "Schrodinger's indictment" to stay sealed, especially because it doesn't exist

"Precrime" algorithm coming soon to UK streets just wants to help

Trump claims resemblance to Elvis; Twitter melts down


Nov 27: Google lies to its users, religion flexes its muscles, Bolton dishes it out but can't take it

EU consumer groups condemn Google for deceptive tracking

Dutch church holds marathon month-long service to prevent refugee deportation

Religious persecution? There's an app for that!

Bolton defends hypocritical squeamishness over Khashoggi torture tape


Nov 28: True romance with an F-16, Facebook hates black people, just shoot me already

National Guard commander forced to resign after borrowing company F-16 to visit lover

Silicon Valley race-whisperer finds racism at Facebook, "more Black Lives Matter posters than black people"

Michigan college looks to hockey pucks for protection from active shooters


Nov 29: Privileged parasites infesting America, oh & there's an invasive tick species on the loose; prisoners & pilots both love cock

Laura Loomer chains self to Twitter HQ to make free speech movement look crazy, can't even get arrested by NYPD

Invasive ticks carrying hemorrhagic fevers take US by storm

USAF fires 69th commander for penis doodles

Iowa prisoners sue to keep access to porn


Nov 30: Four year data breach catches Marriott with pants down, Starbucks says pull them back up; Googlers hate the Right; brain implants found to treat depression

Marriott exposed 500 million customers' passport numbers, other data for 4 years - oops

Porn sites stick it to Starbucks after official cockblock

Google mulled delisting conservative media to fight 'fake news'

Convenient new study finds deliciously hackable brain implant treats depression


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