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Depending on whose altar you worship at, last week's shitshow at the Capitol was either a warm fuzzy coalition of democracy-defenders making a last stand against the corrupt megaswamp, a pack of domestic terrorists frothing at the mouth with white supremacy, or the conclusion of Act I of a poorly-written but shockingly well-funded play put on as a distraction from all the fun police-stating to be had while welcoming in the Fourth Industrial Revolution. The spectacle bristled with so many red flags you could barely see the 'Don't Tread on Me's: no cops, guards actually opening doors for the masses to "break in" to the Capitol, the sound of millions of pearls being clutched until their owners' knuckles turn white, and demands for the big bad Orange Man to leave at once lest he wreak unspeakable havoc in, uh, 2 weeks... 

The point is that none of this adds up, and what we're facing is a fourth-rate knockoff of the Patriot Act. All future online communications will be stripped of encryption or liability protection as justified by the eeeevil domestic turrurrists who hate us for our freedumb, with all participants likely geotagged if not for immediate arrest than for inclusion on a watch list that will prevent them from leaving the US in the future. Twitter, Facebook, Google, and Amazon are more powerful than any government, and they've decided there's no point in hiding it anymore. Those who aren't interested in selling their species out to these predators should be sharing This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it., migrating content to other platforms, in general getting the hell off these misshapen Big Tech/Big Brother chimeras before they all blow sky high. 

December 28: EU vax rollout or slow-motion trainwreck? She of many passports stays locked up

European travel insurers warn no vaccine, no trip if EU adopts mandate

8 German care home workers get 5X dose of Pfizer vax, sending 4 to hospital

Ghislaine Maxwell denied $28.5 million bond due to 'extreme flight risk' 

December 29: Buzzfeed's CIA feeding frenzy; Snitch-o-Rama terrified by potential fun; can haz term limits plz?

Buzzfeed launders CIA propaganda on Xinjiang 'slave labor' camps

**Snitch Nation demands more rules to follow as holidays loom & prospect of fun emerges

Schumer & McConnell, poster boys for congressional term limits, tank stimulus talks

December 30: Snitch Nation cackles & crackles; Pelosi & WaPo embrace pot/kettle dichotomy

Karens revel in death of young congressman-elect who didn't actually die of Covid-19

Karens revel in death of 'secret party' app due to finger-wagging NYTimes profile

Pelosi whines at GOP's 2-day 'tolerance for suffering' after she delayed aid for months

Owned by US' richest man, WaPo reprises objection to individual aid checks

December 31: Calling all false flags; Twitter hates science

Iranian FM Zarif warns Trump admin cooking up a false flag to justify war with Tehran

Twitter blocks access to entire European medical journal over ivermectin PReP paper

January 1: 2021 will one-up 2020; take your carrier & shove it; #MeToo for me but not for thee; diversity or die

**Farewell to 2020, but 2021 will be even worse until humanity grows a spine

USS Nimitz sent home with tail between its legs even as Trump hypes Iran threat

Alexander Wang bats back male models' allegations of sexual abuse

Diversity trumps skill & experience in NHS' sprawling anti-pandemic effort

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Many people seem to think now that 2020 is gone, 2021 will revert to normal (not the 'new' kind, either). Indulge in that false sense of complacency at your own risk. They've barely begun to flog the "dark winter" meme, and you can bet that Klaus "I opened the Ark of the Covenant and all I got was this half-melted face" Schwab isn't going to let this simulation finish without a big fat electro-magnetic pulse. He's already declared the world can never return to normal, a declaration echoed by the legions of bootlicking propaganda generators, and becomes Gates-level giggly when talking about the big fat hack attack looming in our future. 

 

Speaking of hack attacks, the Rockefeller Foundation and Global Business Network's Scenarios for Technology and International Development paper from 2010 featured not just Lock Step - the simulation we're living now - but Hack Attack, the third scenario in the text and the one we seem to be heading into now. Meanwhile, the Foundation already has its hooks into the food supply. But we're sure it's just a coincidence. After all, we all know powerful people never collaborate behind the scenes in our duhmocracy. That would be weird.

December 21: Run for your lives, literally; scumbags protecting scumbags; Poland challenges Big Tech; vaccine tantrum; here's (not) looking at you

Last-minute OMFGVIRUS holiday lockdown sends Brits running for the exits

No special counsel to investigate Hunter Biden, Barr says

Poland finds its balls & cracks down on spurious social media censorship

Iowa senator who questioned OMFGVIRUS profiteering blasted for being first in line for jab

ACLU denounces discriminatory & dystopian facial recognition tech at ports

December 22: Cadet see, cadet do; adding insult to injury; Teen Vogue dares you to call its bluff

West Point cadets caught in massive cheat following Pompeo's 'we lied, we cheated, we stole' speech

CNBC wants to share tone-deaf tips on OMFGVIRUS relief as US assets swirl the drain

**Congress gave more money to Israel than to Americans in bloated OMFGVIRUS relief bill

Teen Vogue says buy, don't lease, your custom-made designer genitalia

December 23: Indonesia won't bend the knee to Israel; due diligence what?; cough up your data; get woke, go broke

Indonesia rebuffs bribe to legitimize Israel as Trump admin goes all-out courting Muslim nations

FoxNews host hoaxed by animal rights activist pretending to be Smithfield Foods CEO

ACLU demands FBI turn over data on hacking phones

**Pandermonium is hazardous for your health - & your profits

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As the year draws to a close, our vulture overlords are scrambling to pick the last bits of meat off the American carcass. Demanding we stay home quivering under our beds rather than visit friends and family (spending time with people you actually like is the number one cause of OMFGVIRUS, right up there with logic and critical thinking), the ruling class has tripped over their own programming, forgetting that our national attention span has long since been whittled down to 12 minutes - forget 12 months! OMFGVIRUS fatigue is real, and it might be our only hope of de-podding our pod people. Certainly it's best to exploit this before the virus-dealers distract everyone with an EMP - as promised by Klaus "my face melted when I opened the Ark of the Covenant and all I got was this goofy Star Trek outfit" Schwab. In a just world, he'd be touring schools giving motivational talks about how kids shouldn't desecrate ancient artifacts, but we don't live in one of those.

 

December 14: Believe women, unless Cuomo; Assange pardon hoax; first Pornhub, then the world

#MeWho? Media circles wagons around Cuomo, tuning out sex harassment allegations

Internet explodes with rumor Trump to pardon Assange - only to be disappointed yet again

**Pornhub's ban on 'non-verified' uploaders is sinister template for looming internet crackdown

 

December 15: Corporations above the law; never trust a turtle; the house (of Rothschild) always wins

Outrage builds as Congress poised to shield corporations from all Covid-19 liabilities

Senate majority leader McConnell folds like cheap suit, embraces president-elect Biden

**Biden stacks cabinet with Goldman Sachs duo hours after electoral college vote

 

December 16: Pandermonium backfires; moar cronyism plz; Beetlejuice loves crooked cops; Pfizer sucks at PR

**Buttigieg heralded as first LGBT cabinet member as Trump's DNI Grenell forgotten

**Who needs competence when you have ass-kissing? Biden follows in Trump's footsteps

Chicago mayor tries to suppress footage of police raid on wrong home, threatening to sue victim

Pfizer insists it's fixing problem as yet another health worker suffers allergic vaccine reaction

 

December 17: First Amendment filleted; triumph of the shill; no work for you; hypocrisy? in MY government?!

**Cuomo declares war on First Amendment with Trojan-horse ban on Confederate flags

Facebook reverts to pre-election censorship levels, declaring Mission Accomplished

US unemployment claims soar as Congress refuses to lift a finger for economic aid

Rhode Island governor joins lockdown-hypocrite hall of fame, violating her own rules

 

December 18: Who needs truth when you have clout; take your mask & shove it; BeastMarks, the hot new crypto; creepers gonna creep; shut up & look pretty

Pentagon pauses meetings with Biden administration, breathless report claims

NYTimes retracts podcast featuring bogus 'ISIS executioner' who never went to Syria

Sweden's call for masks on transit triggers explosion of schadenfreude - despite no mandate

Presidential candidate turned Great Reset shill Yang embraces digital vaccine certificates

Owner of world's largest smurf collection (& token white van) unsurprisingly convicted of child rape

**Washed-up sports celebrity warns other washed-up celebrities against public wrongthink

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Between Time Magazine's introduction of the "guardian of the year" category - occupied in true fascist fashion by walking Napoleon complex Anthony Fauci, flanked by "frontline healthcare heroes" (you can never recycle 9/11 too much) and the Black Lives Matter protesters unhelpfully demanding that we "say their names" (because it keeps our mouths too busy to demand real change) - and Rapture-Ready Mike Pence's revelation that 'murica's Space Force goons will also be called "guardians" (to say nothing of the UK propaganda rag by the same name, or the many dystopian films that use the term to describe secret police) - it's clear we are headed for a very draconian crackdown indeed, presumably timed to coincide with Christmas/New Year. We will be told it is punishment for relaxing our guard against OMFGVIRUS over the holidays, for failing to keep up our sacrifices to the almighty pathogen and being distracted by such petty human concerns as wanting to spend time with our loved ones. One would have to be truly weak - nay, human! - to put one's own desire for human contact above the demands of the State (hint: snitch, snitch, and snitch some more). 

Surely the constant amygdala-flogging must be self-limiting at some point? Has anyone dissected a pod-person's brain to see what's left in there? Something has to give. 

December 7: Clogging the sky with an all-seeing eye; the Corbyn Effect; 'obey' is not a memorable quote

Elon Musk wins broadband contract to blanket sky with surveillance satellites

Labour faith minister resigns & begs forgiveness for innocuous gay marriage comment

**Fauci's 'Wear a mask' declared quote of the year by revisionist Yale bootlicker

December 8: Uncle Sam wants kill-crazy sociopaths; let us snoop or no vax for you; Flynn win; poison Apple

Afghan civilian casualties more than tripled under 'end the wars' Trump

US Army fires & suspends 14 over epidemic of homicide & abuse at Fort Hood

States balk as CDC demands reams of private info on Covid-19 vaccine recipients

Judge finally dismisses case against Mike Flynn after Trump pardon renders it pointless

Apple unveils $549 headphones, proving its fanboys will buy anything

December 9: Failing upwards; fat cats dine out on suffering; Wolf in sheep's clothing

Punchlines write themselves as Biden rumored to pick Buttigieg as China ambassador

Biden's Pentagon pick would require another congressional waiver - but muh diversity!

Billionaires' pandemic profits alone could pay for a $3,000 stimulus to every American

Pennsylvania governor tests positive for OMFGVIRUS despite dutiful worship at its altar

December 10: Ditch CIA's bitch; more failing upwards; shit your pants for health; Pandermonium ensues; medical fascism so hot rn

Venezuelan opposition figure urges Biden to drop Guaido charade

Biden appoints Susan Rice to domestic policy post despite no stateside experience

Sexual harassment & institutional coverup rampant in FBI, investigation finds

Chinese airline guidelines suggest flight attendants wear diapers to avoid germy toilets

'Frontline healthcare heroes' & BLM given Time's participation trophy

**Biden & Harris named 'person of the year' in predictable Orange Man Bad gesture

**Time celebrates medical fascism by naming Fauci 'guardian of the year'

December 11: Beast turns tail; Pentagon needs moar snoops; Cuomo hates your business; conscience-cleaning science

**Daily Beast quails after demanding jail for Trump supporters when their pals get doxxed

Pentagon wants still more help to snoop on & sway public sentiment on Twitter

Cuomo reimposes indoor dining ban despite admitting it's responsible for <2% of infections

Small children prefer toys to experiences, study says - just in time for no more vacations ever

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While Americans continue to fixate on yet another fraudulent election (as if every other election in the last 20 years wasn't also fraudulent), the Cult of Corona is getting away with murder. Whether it's smuggling Known Traveler Digital Identity into airline travel under the guise of "health passports," or the unilateral decision to issue 'vaccine cards' to those who've volunteered themselves as unpaid guinea pigs for Pfizer's toxic mRNA-altering soup, all these dystopian developments can no longer be called 'conspiracy theory' by even the most obtuse establishment bootlicker. If we want to remain a free species it's time to stop fantasizing about invisible watermarks on blockchained ballots and understand that same blockchain tech will be used to track you & yours - just like it's now used to track pigs, cocoa, &, uh, Syrian refugees. Not interested in being a 'thing' in the internet of things? Too bad. You're cattle in the ruling class' people farm. Our only hope is to become unmanageable.

November 30: Gaffe princess for dementia king; undemocratic democracies; drowning Apple's sorrows; insult added to injury

**Only foot-in-mouth Jen Psaki can make animated vegetable Biden seem well-spoken

US sanctions Chinese electronics firm for helping Venezuela 'undermine democracy' (that's our job!)

Arizona certifies Biden as 2020 election winner, clearing the way for more Trump lawsuits

Apple fined for lying about iPhones' waterproof capabilities in another win for Italian antitrust body

Americans are being systematically short-changed by pandemic unemployment programs, GAO says

December 1: Nasdaq gets woke, you go broke; how not to rewrite history; boycott is awfully sexist language; New Abnormal readily swallowed

NASDAQ demands listed companies insert women & 'diverse' directors into their boards or face exile

NYT's Krugman claims Biden is the first president opposition has declared illegitimate in bold revisionism attempt

Lush threatened with LGBT boycott over support for women's org despite history of catering to gendermania

**New Yorker tests effects of 'New Normalization' with cover skewering quarantine stereotypes (and its own audience)

December 2: iPhone backdoor exposed 6 months too late; pearl clutching for carpetbaggers; rich say no to OMFGVIRUS restaurant shutdown

Google hacker reveals iPhones could be remotely pwned, 6 months after the vulnerability was patched

'Our democracy's near death experience' must inspire Georgia to hand Senate to Dems, pearl-clutching Rice says

Beverly Hills city council threatens legal action over LA County's indoor dining ban in reverse class-war

December 3: Pfizer lies again; Noem slammed for sane governance; Facebook brings indentured servitude back

Despite promising not to ship before FDA approval, Pfizer already flooding the US with its Covid-19 vaccine

**SD gov Kristi Noem attacked for not locking down state over her 98-year-old grandma's death from non-Covid causes

Justice Dept sues Facebook for shutting out US citizen workers to sponsor (& entrap) H1-B visa holders

December 4: Pot calls kettle tyrannical; Big Business can't meme; self-licking ice cream cones; Priorities? What are those?

State Dept sanctions even more Chinese gov't employees while insisting Beijing is the tyrant

Twitter's call to 'describe 2020 in one word' backfires on brands (& Israel) trying to seem relatable

FBI warns foreign hackers are targeting the same think tanks that hyped foreign hacker threat

**NY cops are arresting bar owners for (legally) serving free food & booze while murder rate multiplies

Americans roll eyes as House passes marijuana decriminalization but Covid-19 relief remains MIA

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